Chapter 16 - Homeward Bound

Coming home on the 18th December

Firstly, may I apologise for the tardiness of this entry - this is due to a number of reasons; Christmas, fatigue, having a poor memory and working long hours filling Morrisons' shelves with alcohol. But it's here now, and I hope that you had a wonderful Christmas, and as we hurtle towards 2010 (already a tenth of the way through a century!), let me wish you a very Happy New Year! So, if you're sitting comfortably, I shall begin...

The journey home was to take about 10 hours from start to finish, about 5 of which would be spent on trains, and the rest loitering without intent. Was it a simple and straightforward journey....err...don't be silly - when does anything go as smoothly as I plan it?

I had planned on getting up at 5.30 in the morning, but for some reason I decided at 5 o'clock that 5 would be fine! My train didn't leave until 8, but I had to catch the bus to the train station at 7, so had to leave my house about 6.45. I still had a few odds and sods to get finished in the morning ; packing the last few things, sorting out my bedding, basically making sure the room was completely clean. Having completed all of my pre-departure jobs, and checked I still had my tickets, passport, keys, and suitcase (although I'd have to be rather muppet-like to forget this!), I left the house and walked to the bus stop. The first thing that struck me, as I stepped out of my house for the last time for a couple of weeks, was...how bloody cold it was! It was truly freezing! Whilst waiting for the bus I kept walking around to try and warm up a bit - it didn't really work, but it may have helped minutely! The bus was, as per usual, a few minutes, which was the reason I had caught the one an hour before my train; which would give me 40 minutes at the station instead of ten. Nevertheless, about five minutes later I saw the trusty 121 ambling up the hill, winding its merry way to the Hauptbahnhof (which is a word I've used so many times during this blog, that even non-Germanists will understand what it means!).

The bus arrived at the Hauptbahnhof a mere three minutes late; such is the combination of the skill of the driver, and, more importantly, the fact that only two other people got on all the way to the station. This meant that I had about 35 minutes at the station, which meant I had enough time to go and buy a coffee; somewhat necessary considering the time I got up in the morning. At the station I met up with Claire and Lucy who were both catching the 08.00 ICE from Saarbruecken to Paris, calling at Forbach (which is possibly the least important town in France to be served by a TGV station!). At Paris we were all going back by Eurostar, but we'd managed to book 3 different ones!

The journey to Paris started with a sense of foreboding tardiness...the train was to be about 10 minutes late into Saarbruecken, which wouldn't be a problem as we all had at least 45 minutes in Paris to travel to the Eurostar Terminal. On the train, I exchanged a "bonjour" with a member of the Police Aux Frontières (PAF for short; French Border Police arm of the National Police), as they walked through the train looking for anyone who looks to be both un-French, and un-European! The PAF alight at Forbach and, I presume, wait for the ICE going the other way and do the whole thing again! The journey to Paris started OK, but as we got further into France, the snow thickened, and the snowfall was increasing. Both of these combined meant that our train had to cover substantial parts of the journey at a reduced speed. (I suppose that it's difficult to clear thick snow off of the windscreen at 230km/h, and braking may be slightly impeded by the ice too!)

It was on our way to Paris that I found out that we would overtake Harriet on our journey home. Harriet had left on Thursday, and had planned to fly from Charles de Gaulle Airport in Paris, however the snow had a much more catastrophic effect on planes and airports than on trains. As such, she didn't fly home until the Saturday; so in effect her journey took 3 days. So, whilst snow might look nice and pretty, and you might dream of a White Christmas; please spare a thought for those who are travelling and who may be stranded!

As we approached our scheduled arrival time in Paris an announcement came out over the tannoy explaining that we would be about 30 minutes late arriving into Paris. This was reassuring, because at 09.50 (the scheduled arrival time), we were still in the middle of the countryside...and I've only been to Paris a couple of times, but I remember it wasn't that green! Their prediction did prove to be relatively accurate, and the train did pull itself (for you grammar freaks; note the inappropriate use of a reflexive verb there - and then note the uncaring look on my face!) into Paris Est at about 10.20. This wasn't too much of an issue for me because my Eurostar didn't leave until 12.15. Claire had even more time, so was going to explore the French Capital a bit before she went home; so we sorted her out with maps, and a day ticket for the public transport network (not all of which was on strike surprisingly; given the proximity to Christmas!).

The journey from Paris Est to Paris Gare du Nord was a journey that, according to Google Maps, was 600m long. This meant it was walkable; indeed walking was a damn site more preferable than heaving my case down to the underground metro station, forcing my way onto a train filled with Parisians and then heaving it upstairs again about 2 minutes later. For the sake of 5-10 minutes I walked; with my hand-drawn map - which looks like I was drunk when I did it...which I wasn't!

Arriving at Gare du Nord, I had forgotten something else that is quit prevalent in Paris; beggars, who try and guilt-trip you into donating - by asking first of all - "Do you speak English?". In all honesty, it was easier to reply to them in German than English anyway - their English may have been at an equal standard to mine. Leaving them behind, I strode confidently into Paris Gare du Nord station. In the words of Jeremy Clarkson, "How hard can it be?" - I've been to train stations before, I've crossed national borders before, I've caught trains across international frontiers before, I've even caught the Eurostar before (about 6 years ago and from Waterloo to Lille)...so given that I had accomplished all four of the above criteria I imagined it wouldn't be very hard....I was wrong! My first mistake had been striding too confidently into the station - it turned out, later, I had walked right past the Eurostar ticket office. The queue for which was loooooooong and had only one cashier working it! I wasn't entirely sure this was where I wanted to be, so I waited for a bit, in a stationary position, before digging out the relevant paperwork from my bag, and reading through the whole blurb accompanying the booking reference. The blurb directed me to check-in, where I would find some automatic machines for collecting my ticket. So, I left the queue, not that I'd gained any space, and headed off in search of the check-in. This, I found eventually, after walking aimlessly for a bit, in search of a Eurostar logo. The check-in procedure itself is not too time-consuming. You hand in your ticket to the person at the counter, who then waves you through to more PAF (my second lot today), who had a rather thorough look at my passport, who then wave you onto to the UKBA (or whatever they call themselves these days!), who, after a much briefer passport check, wave you onto the Douanes. Regular readers of this blog will know that I've had a couple of encounters with the Douanes already. I was about to have my third! After passing through the UK Border Agency control, you have to walk through a metal detector and put your bags through an x-ray machine, but you're not allowed to have the following things on your person: mobile phone (I had 2), MP3 Player, Cameras, Keys, Memory Stick, or coins - all of these had to be put in your bag...which, if you're like me, was pretty full already! Nevertheless I complied with these regulations and walked through the metal detector, which buzzed, so I took off my coat (metal poppers) and walked through again - I buzzed again. The Douane at the detector suddenly had an evil glint in her eye - out comes the wand (that genuinely isn't a euphemism!) and then I have it waved over me to try and pinpoint the metal - which narrows it down to my belt (which, I wasn't planning on removing). Still, not entirely satisfied, she decides that I need to be frisked, which she does while I look do my best star impression. After this search reveals nothing, I'm allowed to continue. Why didn't I put up a fuss I know you're thinking to yourself - the answer is very simple - I was in France, she was a French person in authority - you should never rise up against them...they like nothing more than to be more annoying and disruptive than is actually necessary, which they will do if you argue with them.

So, after surviving yet another encounter of the less than pleasant kind on the French frontier, I head to waiting room B, where there are no seats left. This isn't a problem - having lived in Germany for four months, the next thing I do is almost natural now. Seeing there were no seats, and that we were scheduled to embark in about 20 minutes, I went along to the door to the station and waited until it was time! After about 15 minutes an announcement comes over the PA system informing us that embarkation will be delayed by about 15 minutes because of the late arrival of the train. Ah, well, I had about two and a half hours in London to get from St. Pancras to Paddington - I wasn't too concerned. Indeed, after about 15 minutes we were allowed to get on our trains. It's worth boring you with one fact about the Eurostar - the whole train is about 1/4 mile in length - which is fine, unless, like me, you're in coach 3 - which felt like it was pretty much in Lille anyway! Still, having eventually got on the train, and found my seat, I got into my book and waited for departure. We left about 15 minutes late (at least Eurostar are consistent), and were told that we would probably have another 20-25 minutes added onto our journey because of speed restrictions that had been imposed because of the bad weather.

We left Paris in a northerly direction and were soon heading out towards St. Pancras International racing through the gloriously white French countryside. All was well, or so I thought! All of a sudden the train started braking quite sharply - not at an emergency stop level, but still quite sharply; the train had developped a fault, which the driver would attempt to fix. After about 20 minutes of lights flickering and being passed by TGVs in the opposite direction we set off again - with the total delay now running at about 35 minutes. Still, we managed to make it to Lille, then on to Calais, Sangatte and into the Channel Tunnel. Now you will almost certainly have heard about the horrendous problems that Eurostar were experiencing on this Friday in the Channel Tunnel - something to do with ice getting in the air vents or something - which caused the trains to break down in the tunnel; where it's dark and not a huge amount of fun to be stuck for hours. Luckily, I managed to avoid these delays. We made it through the Chunnel (as it's affectionately known among anoraks) in a pretty average 28 minutes, before heading off towards St. Pancras International. We'd been told we'd be in London about 40 minutes, which, whilst eating into my transfer time, left it in a pretty healthy condition. This was until we had to make an unscheduled stop in Ashford International - because they had to pick a member of the train crew up! Quite why they couldn't catch a conventional train to London is beyond me - I don't flag down Morrisons lorries on my way to work if I'm running a bit late...

Anyway, we arrived into St. Pancras International about 50 minutes late in the end - leaving me 1 hour and 40 minutes to travel across London to Paddington Station. Now I've not been to London a huge number of times, and I've used the tube twice before this journey (both on the same day!) - but as in Paris, I thought, I've caught trains before, I've used public transport before - I had the added advantage that whilst I don't quite have the London dialect down to a T I can make myself understood by using my mother tongue (and maybe not too many Rs)! As it happens it was a very easy journey to make - the underground trip was very easy - even with a suitcase. There were very few people on the carriage, and I was only on it for about 10 minutes.

On arrival at Paddington I realised what Esther meant when she talked about the steps....there were lots of them, and no real organised system to go up/down them - perhaps I expected too much! I had some time to kill in Paddington, so I sat down, topped up my UK phone, read a book, and waited until they announced which platform my train would leave from. At about 15.53 they told us the platform, from which the 16.00 was leaving. This train left on time, and was not held up by any snow; and there was some until about Didcot where it just became wet! The train pulled into Chippenham at 17.08 - running a couple of minutes early, where I was met by my parents in the car and whisked away!

As you can tell, a lot happened on this journey, but I was very lucky, and I'm very grateful for that. Whilst I had some minor inconveniences they were nothing compared to those of Harriet and Jack who were stuck in Paris, and the Channel Tunnel respectively for very long periods of time. So, whilst I may seem like I'm complaining - I'm really not! I actually enjoyed it - it was an adventure, and whilst I'll miss being at home, I'm looking froward to the journey back - simply because it's an adventure - and yes, I'm a child at heart!

The next instalment will be done after I get back, hopefully a little more promptly than this one was! As I said at the beginning, have a fantastic 2010, whatever you're doing! Thanks, also, to the people who have left kind words on my blog, and my Dad, who has left sarcastic ones!

See you in 2010!